What I'm Reading; Thanksgiving edition

Happy Thanksgiving!

As I enjoy the national holiday from the seat of my pants, alone with work in the horizon of a couple hours, I thought I'd provide some insight into what's been up and down, so to speak.

Here is an interesting story to ponder over as we celebrate that 1st Thanksgiving.

The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade skipped Broadway, this year for the first time.

On something I've read a lot about, the genetic mutation of what we have come to know that is actually a super-turkey, may soon come to an end. Goodbye big-bland-tasting bird, hello smaller, more-expensive-more-rich-flavored bird.

The Detroit Lions are staying on Thanksgiving. IMO, good.

If you haven't seen or heard the bell ringers for the Salvation Army, they now are taking credit or debit.

I've been working consistently at Damar Services for more than 2 months now, and I've come to the conclusion; there will always be good days and bad days. The best thing I've learned to do is to leave everyday at work, and work day-to-day.

Recently, I've felt personal gains with some of the kids. After reading some of their files I have found less reason to become aggravated with behaviors and more inspiration to try and understand what I can do to help.

I struggle with getting the kids to listen to me for a couple reasons I can guess; one, they have a hard time relating with me and two, they just don't care about what someone, with a position of power, over them, has to say.

Interestingly, when I have found a way to lower myself to them (in hypothetical sense only) I have found they listen, and are much more happy with my presence. Joking and having a good time with them is not hard and I struggle with the staff whom cannot find it within themselves to enjoy their time with the kids.

On the staff, I have met some good, some not so good, and some who just show up for a paycheck. I never want to a paycheck person.

Moving on, it is a sad cycle for some of the kids. Watching some of the kids progress within the captive environment is all for naught oftentimes, as many leave and revert to behaviors that seemed to have been irradiated. Also, some complete their treatment plan and because of a lack of family or guardian support and/or consistency, they fall back into the system and sadly if they have reached adult-age that often means incarceration.

I want to get in the minds of the kids but become so aggravated with my own deficiencies, limiting my ability to understand and make breakthroughs with the kids, who may only need one explanation to turn a major corner. I am thankful for this opportunity, but I feel so much time is wasted and it pains me to no end to know that I leave every day at 11 p.m., with the kids sleeping, and I haven't figured out a way to suppress a behavior that would otherwise help them to be at peace with themselves and/or the environment they see around them.

I watch kids struggle with thoughts, memories and defense mechanisms that have been socially conditioned within them from dealing with the horrific lives most of them have experienced. I want to feel their pain in more real terms, so as to understand and have them understand that I am always there to help.

So, today i want to express my thankfulness in having the opportunity to be around the people I hope to help. I am thankful for the chance to be a positive person in their lives and someone they can rely on and trust, the likeness they may have never known.

Today I work from Noon-11 p.m., again, as I am enjoying Thanksgiving with one client's family, via supervised home-visit. It is not ideal for me, or my family who spend another holiday without my presence, but the focus is on the people of need I now attempt to empower. Having the thankfulness to understand my family eats w/out me because I've been so lucky to have a supporting family, is key. Redirecting that thankfulness and giving of myself to help one of my kids enjoy a Thanksgiving, is what is important today.

And I'm thankful for the opportunity.

What I"m Reading 10.30

A lot is going on in the news and a few other things, aside from my new job as a direct support technician at a organization supporting children with developmental and behavioral challenges.

Some days, more than others, I find a ton of interesting stuff on the 'internets' and I feel that it's necessary for you to take part (you who are undefined).

For example: the largest cruise ship in the world is in Miami. The 'Oasis of the Seas' boasts 2,700 cabins and can hold 6,300 passengers.

How is this for irony: a man in Minnesota was mauled by a dog he rescued. Not exactly a plug for HELP shelter and like rescue organizations.

Speaking of Richmond (HELP shelter), on a sad note, a great man passed away this week. Audry Reichter, father of my babysitter, lived an extraordinary life as a WWII veteran and foster parent, with his wife, for more than 2,000 children since 1947. He was 87.

A Washington television station is receiving both praise and critical glances after airing a live-action video of how to properly administer a breast self-exam.

The Phillies and Yankees are even at 1-1 in the World Series.

The Baltimore Ravens, although handled by my Cincinnati Bengals, may be the best 3-3 team imaginable. I'll take them over 6-0 Denver on Sunday.

Perhaps the trade of the decade: Cleveland sent Barolo Colon and Tim Walker to the Expos for Cliff Lee, Grady Sizemore, Brandon Phillips and Lee Stevens. In retrospect; wow!

Back to Bengals talk: Ochocinco, promoting his new book on the off-week, was on Letterman last night reading the Top-10 list.

Also on the Bengals: Carson Palmer has been the key to Cincinnati's early success.

Away from the Bengals and down to Athens, GA: a woman apparently acted like a dog to scare off a man.

Here is a story about the resurected Paul Reubens (Pee-Wee Herman).

Is there a real Jaws out there? Check out the picture on the link.

And finally, a trailer for a new movie about John Lennon's early life: "Nowhere Boy."

Contradicting Perspectives

I want you to think of your first memories. Remember the early times that formed you, at early ages; things that helped you become who you are.

Now, think about who might have lifted you to the table to blow out your birthday candles. Remember who was there to help you when you fell off your bicycle. Think about the times spent with the ones closest to you, the ones who nurtured you and the ones you rebelled against, only to come back to when you needed them the most.

Now, try and think about what your life would be w/out those who did so little, that became so much, in retrospect. Imagine your life w/out happy times and w/out the sad times; having the ability to have someone there to help you or, enjoy times with you. Imagine them not wanting to.

Speaking in general terms, kids i now have the opportunity to help have lived lives without, what most of us have taken for granted. Attempting to reason with someone, who has known a life directly contradictory to my own is a feat. These kids are living with burdens and experiences some of us can't begin to imagine and can never truly understand.

The image of abuse and neglect, I can now see in the faces of so many, causing behavioral and emotional problems have been spawned from the people who were supposed to be there for them the most. No one living a 'normal' life can imagine what they would have become w/out nurturing loved ones. Yet, given the opportunity to change a view of the world and of life, held by someone who has known no true happiness and no true 'loved' one, is an opportunity worth grasping.

Attempting to understand 'my' kids' perspective is difficult but possible, at least on a degree enough to help change a perspective, or have them see things through the help of someone they can trust. Helping one of them understand, despite their pain, that hurting someone else is never going to alleviate their greatest fears of abuse, is possible.

Changing the mindset of the people you are told to trust, will not let you down, is also possible but only if a staff or concerned individual has the ability to give of themselves on an even greater level than even our parents did for us.

"True success is measured only in the growth of an individual."

Yesterday, I felt I gained trust in one, and was able to develop a goal, in another. I want to be someone trustworthy enough, for those who have never known, or had the ability to know anyone they could truly rely on. I want to change perspective(s).

New Observations on Life

The two weeks of orientation were set to enlighten and yet, scare away those feeling that working with children having been through some of the most traumatic life experiences and dreadful treatment known. I pushed through, because that's what I do best and it is only now, as I'm head-on into the job, that I see the images of tragedy and pain those I work with have been through.

The challenge of working with children known and documented as being 'dangerous' and 'disabled', is finding it within yourself to change your perspective of how everything is 'supposed to' work in this world and realize how things sometimes work in the most horrific of situations.

Two full days into the job, about to head for a third, I have been pressed already; morally, physically and psychologically, and yet, no matter the hardship I face in attempting to do all in my power to help, I can never fully understand the pain some of 'my' kids have been put through in their lives. Understanding why a youngster may do something to harm themselves or someone else is best examined after knowing what a child has been through. And that is tough, considering everyone has some handle on how parenting in a 'normal' world works. Helping people who have never had 'real' parents is difficult when brains and trust have been morphed the way these kids' have.

I'm going to do my best to document what I see, keeping anonymity, of course; leaving out specifics often but getting at the root of how and why things happen, things I can only imagine.

A 'job' pushing ones pschy and mental perspective, is not really a job but, a blessing and something an enlightened person can take and do great things with for others. I hope to be that enlightened person and I hope to help change lives for the people I see as, no one else has before; as precious, raw and propitious people.

Jobs, California and Knashing Teeth

Yesterday I learned I now have a job - with the grace of a negative pee test and criminal background check. I think I'll be OK.

I also inquired through car transport company I'm working for, into a car in Riverside, Calif. MATS president Josh said that usually cars further away, like cars in California, are usually shipped. However, for a flat pay amount he said I could pick the car up and drive it back. So, I'm going to California Monday, September 28 to pick up a 2009 Chrysler Sebring.

I have coordinated with a cousin of my G-pa Sheets, who lives in Corona, Calif. to pick me up and take me to the car. I am very appreciative for the ride and I hope to have a good visit with my family from a distant land; roughly 2,400 miles.

On my way back, after visiting with family, and a couple of friends in L.A., I plan on hitting the Grand Canyon, Las Vegas, Four Corners and whatever I see along the way.

I have worked with my new employer and will not start my orientation until October 12. I will be working for Damar Services, assisting and supervising adolescents with disabilities. It is full-time with benefits. I won't know what to do with a regular pay check. Hopefully I won't do what I do with money, now.

As for the 'knashing teeth' title, I don't know why I said that.